Forever Alone… (Gladly)

Valentines Day 2019:Being Asexual, relationships and doing what YOU love.

I’m asexual, and so is about 1% of the population of not only the UK but the whole world. So yes. We do exist. We aren’t a myth. But let’s clarify one thing about the term asexual…

For me, I see myself as an Asexual individual who doesn’t want any relationship with a significant partner, either sexual or purely platonic; no dates, no romance.

“But you’ll change your mind!”

“Maybe you just haven’t met the right person yet!”

“How do you know if you’ve never ‘tried’?

To this I say…

Thank-you.

Thank-you for telling me what I already know; yes I don’t want a relationship. No I am not looking. I am comfortable in turning people down; ironically- it’s something I’ve had to do a few times.

“So, do you love at all?”

Besides coffee (as I sit here writing this with an espresso in hand); the answer is yes. I do love. I love that little 4 letter word…

Life.

The possibilities. The adventure. The thrill of waking up in the morning and not knowing what will happen. The suspense where I find myself at the brink of exploration and new discoveries, excited who or what I’m going to share my creativity with and to learn from. Taking a leap forward into life. Leaning into life and learning from life as I live. Just living.

I’ve changed a lot.

It hasn’t always been like this… 5 years ago I really didn’t love life (as I talked about in Episode 1 of the Spectrum Series Podcast).

To think back and ponder on that state of mind I was in at that time, I didn’t love anything but the detrimental distractions stopping me from seeing anything but loss. Losing my mind, losing everything I’d ever done, and ultimately, losing my life. I felt like my relationship with the world was so distant.

I realised that it’s okay not to be okay. It’s okay to enjoy things that others may not. It’s okay to be you.

If I can love what I do; I’ll live loving life and have a relationship with the world that I can share the positivity through in a kind of platonic partnership with everyone in society. As a game-changer, as an adventure seeker, and as a worthwhile individual amongst society.

I’ve got to love myself for anything to change. For the world to change surrounding stigmas. For everybody to have a voice.

You can only be you.

Because you can’t change other people; you may be able to massage and make tender certain emotions, or situations, but at the end of it all; it’s up to the individual to shape their own journey.

Really, love is what you make of it. It’s you, knowing you, and accepting yourself for who you are.

So…

Love yourself. You’re worth it.

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